Hosepipe ban in southern England

Several people in the States have recently asked me about the drought in southern England. This happens periodically, I say, and always there is a hosepipe ban decreed for the summer. A what? No one seems to know what a 'hosepipe' is!

English garden hosepipe and watering can

A hosepipe is your garden hose. A hosepipe ban is a ban on using your hose to water your garden. And remember, 'garden' here in England means your lawn and your flowers, not your vegetable garden – though the ban would apply equally there.

So, does everything die in the dry weather (notice I didn't say 'hot')? No, because you are allowed to water your garden with a watering can. Of course this means that only the important things get watered because the can is much too heavy and it would take too long to water the whole lawn that way. But on the other hand, very very few people have a lawn of any size – usually just a token patch of grass that hardly warrants a lawnmower.

In the north of England we don't have the problem of insufficient rainfall – at least not yet. Furthermore, we have a huge reservoir in the form of Kielder Water in Northumberland. This was built between 1976 and 1982 to supply water to the three northeastern river valleys: Tyne, Tees and Wear (pronounced 'weir'). There is more than enough water there to also supply southern England, but no pipes exist to carry it south.

James Lovelock, creator of the Gaia hypothesis that the Earth is a homeostatic living system, has said that Britain will become 'battleship Britain', as it is one of the only places on Earth where the moderate climate and rainfall will be able to sustain life as the climate warms to desert level –everyone will be beating down our doors to get in. Unless Britain again is clothed with snow due to the closing of the polar door (the what?), this might well be true.

So I think we are sitting pretty at the moment before disaster begins. And if you don't think disaster will happen, you haven't been reading geology.

PS Yep, the Hosepipe Ban is now set to start on April 5th, with eleven other restrictions in place: you can't use a "hose or sprinkler to water plants, wash a car or boat, fill fountains, swimming or paddling pools, or to clean patios, driveways or windows", says the Daily Mail (13mar12), and if you do, you will be served with a Yellow Card letter from the water company to tell you to obey the law.